Wanted on Wednesday: Girl Power


I can admit it. I haven't but just a couple super close female friends. Sometimes, it really bums me out, not being able to both be there for and lean on a close-knit group of girlfriends. I can't believe I'm alone in this either. Why is that that we, as adult women, tend to not reach out, support, encourage, and uplift other women? Why is it so hard to make friends?

Honestly, I don't even know where to begin. Or perhaps I do know, but I'm too afraid to put myself out there for risk of feeling like a big ol' nerd who has to sit alone in the art room during lunch? Those fears prey upon that tender place in my heart that I pretend doesn't exist...it's the same fear I had as the new kid at school. Truth be told, I loathe being the new kid and that I can't grow out of that persona I've developed for myself. The irony is that, once put in those types of situations, I thrive and blossom. I'm a complete extrovert Lioness. It's just taking that first step that's the hard part for me. A large part of me wishes I had kids to bond with other moms. Or a dog. Or a gym. Or some kind of routine that didn't involve locking myself away in my kick-ass office all day...

But we all know that those are imaginary obstacles.

Those are the excuses I've devised to prevent me from actually having to do something to get out there and make new friendships. A large part of me wishes someone would reach out to me so I didn't have to.

I think it's time for me to put on my big girl britches and do something about it. I did follow Bradee's chutzpah and joined the same online book club as she, but I have too much going on to actively participate right now. I'd love to volunteer at an animal shelter like I did in college, but that's only because I have a tendency to like little critters more than humans...there are super awesome crafty meet-ups in Columbus, but I'm too scared to go alone and can't bring myself to show up with my husband. Because that's just pitiful.



Diana said...

Thanks for joining the club. It's all at your own pace so it's definitely not the typical book club :)

I don't have very many female friends and the "bff's" i did have broke my heart, so I can relate to this.
I think you have the power to surprise yourself!

bradee said...

AMEN to all of the above!!!

seriously girl... that couldve been me writing this exact post.

in an i guess weird but honest kind of way... i have found the online community to sort be my new friends! i know this is pitiful but its just true. even tho i dream up great adventures of actually goin out & expanding my social horizons i never seem to have the chutzpah ;) as you so eloquently put it to follow thru! ugh.

as for the book club... the book is a quick read even if u just do one chapter a nite... and its good! luckily i found a library that had it so i couldnt even use that as an excuse! hehe

anyhoo... know ur not alone & uv always got us ;)


Mommy dearest said...

Your bff mother will go out and do craftie things with ya in C-Bus till ya get all comfy-cozy. (She has sorta become the queen of gal pal club involvement since she retired.)

What sayeth thee, my sweetums?

Toria said...

I used to be exactly the same (hell, sometimes I still am). When I moved to the village I currently live in I actually bought a dog to help me meet people (and to give me company as I go a-wandering over the mountains). A crutch is a wonderful thing! ;)

As someone who's trying to do more things alone, I think once you're over the hurdle of going somewhere by yourself once, it's easy to keep going back. I don't know about you but it's the new that I have a problem with and once I'm familiar with what's going to happen at a place I can cope with going back.

To get me there in the first place I tend to procrastinate and procrastinate until I get really angry at myself and get all fired up and ready to go. Unfortunately by then it's normally 11pm and too late to act on it but there has been times when it's all worked out nicely. Or I'll impulsively decide to do something and will rush out then and there before I can second guess myself. And, for me, living in a small community has helped enormously.

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