And Now For Something Completely Different

Wink the Cat went to the vet today because she has groomed herself almost completely bald on one side of her body over the last few weeks. Being a domestic long-hair tuxedo, it's pretty easy to notice the spotty blueish skin against black fur, let me tell you what. Now, I have to preface this story a bit more. Wink does not like people. Not at all. Honestly, she has barely tolerated us for the last nine-ish years. And she really doesn't like vets. She's can be a holy terror anti-Christ when she wants to be. Just ask the vets when she was spayed -- a tornado of claws and teeth and she was just a lil kitty then. Guess what! She hasn't outgrown it...and so the story continues...

Worried sick that something was wrong, we got her into Ohio State's Vet Clinic this afternoon. She surprisingly went into her carrier very easily. This should've been a sign for impending doom, but I took it as a sign of good luck and went with it. Upon speaking to the Senior vet student in charge of Wink's diagnosis, I warned her over and over, trying desperately to reiterate how not nice Wink can be. After several minutes of her not really beliving me (really..how much trouble can a 7-lb, ten year old cat be, right?) I told her, "Listen. I'm really sorry for what's about to happen." She politely nodded and off I went back to the waiting room. D. met me and we waited and waited and still no word. All they were supposed to do is get a blood sample and it was taking a long time. Finally, the student vet came out...with trepedation. We knew she believed us now. Her words? "How do you feel about sedation?" I laughed and signed the waiver. What I really wanted to ask her is how she felt about it...after all, it wasn't ME in the room with one, angry feline!

Long story short, after the first run of blood results taken for a geriatric pre-screen (I still can't believe she's almost ten years told) we met with the vet and student vet who were almost in disbelief of the legend that Wink had made herself. Several hours later, her results were back and abnormal, not for the kidney issues they were considering, but for a strange anomaly with her blood (something about a component of her white blood cells being insanely low.)

They asked us to bring her back (while still under slight sedation) to pull another blood sample (before she has another opportunity to go completely bonkers.) It's a super quick trip and about 15 minutes later, we were on our way home again. Another 30 minutes after that, they called with the good news -- she has a clean bill of health and systemically, she's perfectly healthy. But what about the bald spots, right? She has been diagnosed as having disorder called psychogenic alopecia (aka compulsive overgrooming.) This can happen for a number of reasons... because she's bored, understimulated or sort of obsessive-compulsive. Sheesh! Wink's always been a strange kitty, so we're not enitrely shocked, but ultimately relieved that nothing is seriously wrong. She now will be perscribed an antidepressant (I'm being serious) and we'll have to take steps at home to play more, not reinforce the behavior and provide her healthy distractions when we're at work.

I guess we just have to get used to the idea that our consistently neurotic-yet-beautiful fraidy cat will be a balding geriatric on kitty Prozak, potentially for the rest of her life. What a weird day...